Robert D. Bessler
Valentine’s Day – Two Voices One Soul
Updated: Jun 17, 2019
As promised, my beautiful wife, Amy, has joined forces with me to bring you this very special Valentine’s Day edition article. I felt it might be refreshing to hear the perspective of this holiday from both male and female points of view. Plus, what better way to share the Soul-Mate perspective of this romantic holiday than to have both Soul-Mates provide their insights on the subject? We are bringing you this article in the hopes of reclaiming the positive and loving message of Valentine’s Day that seems to have been lost, tossed aside in favor of the more sensible approach of the ordinary, egoic mind. Let’s reclaim the romance! Let’s recover the heart-centered love! Let’s take back Valentine’s Day as a day for lovers!
We don't use the term Soul-Mate” lightly. We take this very seriously and mean it quite literally. Not as some over-used fluffy feel-good term, but as an honest-to-goodness experience with the one and only person in the world, your Soul-Mate. The other half of your soul!
Valentine’s Day has been taking a beating in the form of bad press over the past few years and it’s even worse this year. As the media increases its negative and fear driven approach, more articles are written from the negative minds it has infected. It’s important to keep sight of the fact that these types of articles are written by unawakened, ordinary-minded individuals in ordinary relationships or in no relationship at all. When seen through the awakened eyes of extraordinary individuals engaged in an extraordinary relationship, the truth is seen far more clearly. It’s like the existence of two very different worlds within the same dimension. When I speak of the “ordinary” and “extraordinary” it is in reference to those who are unawakened and those who have shifted into a sense of being awakened. I will share more about the three dimensions of relationship in our incredible upcoming Soul-Mate book.
The focus of this holiday is love; the purest of intentions, the highest of all vibrations. These misguided articles of stress and anxiety are based in fear. Fear is the opposite of love in every way, it’s the lowest of all vibrations. Why then should we fill ourselves with fear instead of love on this day? We shouldn’t. We should persist more than ever to open our hearts, raise our vibrations, and let our spirit soar, filling our day with love, romance, and appreciation. Let your soul dance freely in unity with it’s other half.
So, my wife and I have joined forces to reclaim this positive, love-filled holiday. This is a day for lovers, it’s a day for unconditional love. Even if you are currently in the process of attracting your Soul-Mate, we want you to know you are not alone. You are loved. We love you. And it’s important to remember to always love yourself, you can’t attract your Soul-Mate without loving yourself first. We felt that it would be fun and enjoyable to share this wonderful holiday from the perspective of awakened Soul-Mates. I am going to offer a couple of unfortunate, yet typical statements that we have found repeatedly stressed in online articles. They are indicative of the mind that has succumbed to the negative epidemic of the ego. In response, we are going to offer our opinions of those subjects. I hope you find it enlightening.
Valentine’s Day is a day of stress, anxiety, and disappointment. It’s artificial and superficial. It gives men the opportunity to forget about romance throughout the rest of the year.
ROBERT: The way you feel about Valentine’s Day is a direct reflection of your feelings in regards to your own relationship. Its true. Stress and anxiety are a sign of the times in which we live, but they don’t need to be the excuse for not wishing to celebrate this holiday. Many people are feeling these ill effects due to the uncertainty and fearful nature of these quickly changing times. Because of the increase in people being stuck in their heads and consumed by their ego, and being consumed by fear; their nervous systems are completely fried. This causes stress, tension, and anxiety over the least little occurrence. But this doesn’t have to be the case on Valentine’s Day. Take this day to relax, set all other things aside and focus on the one true love of your life. How can you make this day special for them? There’s no need to feel pressured into a relationship just because its Valentine’s Day. Be happy spending the day with yourself as you wait patiently to attract your one and only Soul-Mate. Likewise, it shouldn’t be stressful or as though you are inconvenienced, to plan something special for the one you love. Again, pay attention to how you’re feeling as it may offer some truth regarding your relationship.
The holiday should be fun, exciting, and an opportunity to express your love to your one true love. It should offer you the opportunity to spend time with the person you love doing something special that you both enjoy. If you really know the person you’re with, which is the core of any relationship, the act of you engaging in a thoughtful gesture will be as exciting for you as it is for them to receive it. It melts my heart to see my wife’s face light up. When she’s elated by an experience I created for her or by something I give her, it simply makes my day so much brighter and I feel my heart overflowing with joy.
Seeing this holiday as artificial or superficial is nothing more than the viewpoint of the egoic mind. There is nothing artificial about love. Nor is there anything artificial in being willing to share that love – so long as your love is true. Expressing your love with material things is perfectly fine. Of course, love is the primary focus, but let’s face facts, we all enjoy giving and receiving gifts. The inability to gracefully receive exposes the presence of the ego. Is it artificial to want to do something extra-special for the one person you love most in the world on this particular day? I think not. Is it artificial to desire to make the effort to know what they enjoy and get it for them, or set up an experience for them? Not even a little bit. If whatever you do – dinner, dancing, flowers, jewelry, a romantic card, a heart-felt embrace, a tender kiss, a meaningful “I love you” – comes from your heart, how can that possibly be perceived as superficial? Showing your love is meant to be a genuine heart-felt act, not the thought-based result of purchasing of gifts. Any gifts are meant to be a material representation of the eternal love you feel for the other person. I always have special plans in place throughout the day to brighten Amy’s day. Because nothing brightens my day as much as her happiness.
AMY: I’ve been a little startled this year at seeing all the negative press about Valentine’s Day. When did a holiday about sharing love turn into something dreadful? Even amongst my coworkers I hear that no one is bothering to celebrate, that they won’t even see their significant other or do anything special. Others say that they will have a family dinner with their children. The core of this holiday is about expressing your love to the special person in your life, and it should be a joyful experience; with your love! While it’s great to think your children are special, take this time to reconnect with your partner and create a romantic experience together; this cannot be accomplished if you make it a family affair. I’ve heard from female acquaintances that Valentine’s Day is just an excuse to allow men to slack off the rest of the year, and I think this is an unfortunate mindset.
Robert treats me wonderfully every day of the year, and on holiday’s like this, it’s just a chance to go a little farther than normal for each other. This doesn’t mean we accept negative behavior the rest of the time; if you truly love someone you don’t have the desire to do anything hurtful towards them. So many people allow holidays to stress them out and cause anxiety, when there is no need to put all of these negative emotions on it. When Robert and I are together, any stress and anxiety I was feeling previously melts away; I feel like I’ve come “home” and am at peace, filled with love and happiness. If being in the presence of your partner doesn’t put you at ease, and the thought of spending the evening with them doesn’t thrill you, then perhaps they are simply not the right one. If you don’t have a relationship at this time, don’t waste this day feeling resentful, depressed, or angry at those who do- take the time to show love to yourself! Pamper yourself in some way, however you would best enjoy it- perhaps a great meal, a spa treatment, or an evening pursing some activity that you love.
The Soul-Mate Perspective of Valentine‘s Day.
ROBERT: From a Soul-Mate perspective, Valentine’s Day is an exciting way to show your love in new and creative ways that can manifest into the physical, material world or remain as intangible heart-felt acts of love. When you are an awakened being with your Soul-Mate by your side, every day is an opportunity to express your love. Every step you take together is based in that love. This doesn’t mean that we don’t need Valentine’s Day, indeed, I see this as a wonderful opportunity to go above and beyond what I do for her daily. One of the things we mutually desired from the celebration of this holiday was to enjoy a special dinner somewhere very nice. So, each year we talk about what we are hungry for and we work together to seek out an exciting new upper scale restaurant to visit and share a romantic meal. It’s easy to decide on the location because we think alike and have the same tastes, which is evidence of being with your Soul-Mate. This has become the core of our own personal custom for the holiday. Of course, we get each other gifts of some sort as well, but the idea is to spend time together and to truly open our hearts and connect to one another very deeply. To offer our complete undivided attention to each other, immersing ourselves into the other. I feel that’s an important component of Valentine’s Day. When you’re with your true Soul-Mate, there is no reason to feel stress, anxiety or worry. Nor are your gestures artificial or superficial, they are genuine expressions of love directly from your heart to theirs.
Our Valentine’s Day is always filled with loving gestures, caring gifts, and wonderfully romantic experiences to share. I want my loving wife to be surrounded by beautiful, fragrant flowers, to see her smile when opening a gift, and enveloped in the enjoyment of a fine meal. I appreciate nothing more than looking across the table of a romantic restaurant into her incredible eyes as our souls embrace. No words need be spoken, we already know what the other is thinking and feeling. Our eyes fill with tears as our hearts overflow with true love and our vibrations take flight as our souls see themselves in each other. This is such a powerful experience of raw spiritual connection that we both acknowledge and cherish. This is a Soul-Mate Valentine’s Day. Now doesn’t it sound worth celebrating!?
AMY: As I have no doubt that Robert is my Soul-Mate, I would like to share what I feel to be the essence of Valentine’s Day with an anecdote from our lives. When we first moved to California, we had a lot of external circumstances to deal with. Just to give a glimpse, among these were getting re-acclimated to the United States after spending a month abroad in China, having to unpack all of our boxes and furniture from the moving POD in three days, and trying to focus on the start of my new job. There was a lot of external stress, but we didn’t allow it to creep in and effect our relationship with each other. Now, the thing that made me fall in love with our new apartment was the kitchen, which had been fully remodeled before we moved in. Robert and I had grown to love cooking together, and I couldn’t wait to start using the kitchen, especially with all the fresh local ingredients we have access to here, but it wasn’t possible; our stacks of boxes and unpacked belongings filled every countertop and spare square inch of floor. Robert knew I was distressed about this, but I didn’t say much because it was simply a matter of circumstance that had to be dealt with for the time being.
We had gotten each other heartfelt cards and were planning a nice dinner, but due to only one vehicle and really not knowing what was even around our new home, we didn’t have a chance for gifts. On my first day of work- which was on Valentine’s Day!- we had a special breakfast together at the hotel next door before I had to brave the California highways and plunge into my new career. As I returned home, wearily walking in the front door, I was astonished to see my kitchen sparkling clean and box-free. Robert had unpacked all of our kitchen wares, putting them in the proper places, moved all the boxes out of the space, and cleaned the entire thing so it would be available for me. I can’t even imagine how hard he must have worked to accomplish this by the time I came home. To me, this was an incredibly loving gesture from his heart, trying to do something creative that would truly make me happy. I am still touched by it to this day. We spent the rest of the evening at a wonderful seafood restaurant called Fish, right on the harbor in Sausalito, eating steaming bowls of fresh caught delicacies and watching the sea lions play in the waves during sunset. I think this shares the epitome of a Soul-Mate Valentine’s Day; to be loving and do whatever you can to make the other person’s day, taking time to revel in the romance and connection you have to one another.
There you go. I would like to express my appreciation to my amazing, intelligent, and gorgeous wife for taking the time to share her perspective here with us. We are collaborating on a book project right now that will offer the truth about Soul-Mates, redefine what they are believed to be, and explain in detail why this experience is the Holy Grail of relationships. We promise there will be no New Age fluff or sappy silliness – only the most incredible, mind-blowing content ever written on this subject! Then there will be an audio program to follow. This program will include a complete home study course, showing you the way to attracting your Soul-Mate into your life. If that’s still not enough – how would like to attend a special live event held by Amy and myself? We will be working directly with participants to set them on the path to successfully attracting their Soul-Mates, while answering questions, sharing insights, and blowing the roof off the place with our vibrations alone! We promise to offer insights that you will not find anywhere else and they work because they’ll be exactly what we did.
We feel that it’s time to reclaim this lover’s holiday and fill it with the positive energy it deserves. Who cares who made it up or why? Use it as another opportunity to take your love to another level and show that one special person how much you truly care, how much your love continues to grow, and that you hold them in your heart constantly. Allow this day to encourage you to begin living a far more heart-centered life. We hope this inspires you to enjoy your Valentine’s Day, whether you are in a Soul-Mate relationship or not. May it be overflowing with true love, everlasting joy, and an awakened extraordinary relationship! Amy and I would like to open our hearts and share our love with all of you on this incredible day of love and romance.
Please keep checking back here at www.expansionmastery.com for updates regarding our Soul-Mate book, audio program and live events!
I would like to acknowledge and thank Cathy Carter and those who created the fantastic Valentine’s Day artwork that were borrowed from the internet. These are creative and beautiful pieces that I am so pleased to share with all of you. I claim no right to them as I do not own them.